joke

or is the mileage 271,000? http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/2003-MERCEDES-CLK-320-AVANTGARDE-AUTO-BLUE_W0QQitemZ230029010055QQihZ013QQcategoryZ9855QQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem

:) We were watching "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire" in bed last night. I turned to her and said, "Do you want to make love?" "No." She answered. I then said, "Is that your final answer?" Yes." She replied. So I said, " I'd like to phone a friend." That's the last thing I...

Just seen that a woman in North Wales has been fined £200 for applying her make-up whilst driving. Both hands off the wheel!!!! and the car was moving. She pleaded guilty, but I wonder what that plea would have been if there was no video evidence. Police harrassment, innocent motorist victimised...

A Jelly Baby walks into a bar and starts talking to a Smartie. After a few beers the Smartie says "Ere, a bunch of us are heading to that new club, fancy tagging along?" The Jelly Baby says "No mate, I'm a soft centre; I always end up getting my head kicked in." So Smartie...

I'm Irish so I have licence to tell this joke, in fact, I think I worked in this petrol station at one point !: On a golf tour in Ireland, Tiger Woods drives his BMW into a petrol station in a remote part of the Irish countryside. The pump attendant, obviously knows nothing about golf...

A plane is on it's way to Melbourne when Christine, a blondie in Economy Class, gets up and moves to the First Class section and sits down. The flight attendant watches her do this and asks to see her ticket. She then tells the blonde passenger, as she paid for Economy she will have to go and...

A lady walks into a Mercedes dealership. She browses around, then spots the perfect car and walks over to inspect it. As she bends to feel the fine leather upholstery, a loud fart escapes her. Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident and...