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A Speed Trap - with Consequences

whitenemesis

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Two traffic patrol officers from North Berwick were involved in an unusual incident while checking for speeding motorists on the A-1 Great North Road. One of the officers used a hand-held radar device to check the speed of a vehicle approaching over the crest of a hill, and was surprised when the speed was recorded at over 300 mph. Their radar suddenly stopped working and the officers were not able to reset it.

Just then a deafening roar over the treetops revealed that the radar had in fact latched on to a NATO Tornado fighter jet which was engaged in a low-flying exercise over the Border district, approaching from the North Sea.

Back at police headquarters the chief constable fired off a stiff complaint to the RAF Liaison office. Back came the reply in true laconic RAF style:

"Thank you for your message, which allows us to complete the file on this incident. You may be interested to know that the tactical computer in the Tornado had detected the presence of, and subsequently locked onto, your hostile radar equipment and automatically sent a jamming signal back to it. Furthermore, an air-to-ground missile aboard the fully-armed aircraft had also automatically locked onto your equipment.

Fortunately the pilot flying the Tornado recognized the situation for what it was, quickly responded to the missile systems alert status, and was able to override the automated defence system before the missile was launched and your hostile radar installation was destroyed. Good Day..."


Nice one!! :D
 
YEAH! unfortunately heard it before.

Not sure this is physically possible with a handheld radar gun anyone know for sure? I would have thought that without a small distance to 'track' the jet a speed could not have been detected. Furthermore I don't think a low flying aircraft would ever be going as 'slow' as 300mph!
 
If we are analysing this :rolleyes: ...

I would have thought the time betwen the gun picking up on the Tornado, the plane jamming it and appearing would have been almost instant. The 300mph could just be an artifact of the jamming signal I guess
 
If we are analysing this :rolleyes: ...

I would have thought the time betwen the gun picking up on the Tornado, the plane jamming it and appearing would have been almost instant. The 300mph could just be an artifact of the jamming signal I guess
:) Don't even bother there are so many reasons as to why it would not be possible :devil: :)

John
 
I say.........."let loose the beasts of war" and shoot the missiles...:crazy:
 
Nice story - not dissimilar to

"This is a transcript of a radio conversation between a US Naval ship and Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland",

US SHIP: Please divert your course 0.5 degrees to the South to avoid a collision.

CANADIAN REPLY: Recommend you divert YOUR course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision.

US SHIP: This is the Captain of the US Navy Ship. I say again, divert YOUR course.

CANADIAN REPLY: No, I say again, divert YOUR course!

US SHIP: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS MISSOURI. WE ARE A LARGE WARSHIP OF THE US NAVY. DIVERT YOUR COURSE NOW OR WE WILL TAKE APPROPRIATE AND DRASTIC MEASURES!!!!

CANADIAN REPLY: This is a lighthouse. Your call.


Hundreds of versions - just insert your favourite / least favourite antagonists.
 
Well a copper stopped a man with the aid of breathalysing him.
The man says those things do not work. Go on try it on my baby in the car seat.
The copper puts it in the child’s mouth and it goes red instantly
. The copper goes back to his car and says alright I shall let you off. It is malfunctioning.
The man drives off and tells his wife.
Good idea to rub alcohol on the babies lips.
 
Nice story - not dissimilar to

"This is a transcript of a radio conversation between a US Naval ship and Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland", .
Hey!! I thought the very same thing when I first read this thread.

Regards
John
 
I remember falling out of my cradle with laughter when I heard about the motorcyclist who, rather eccentricly, wore his leather jacket back to front as it was more airtight.

Following an minor accident, a 'Good Samaritan' came to his assistance but broke the guy's neck attempting to turn his head round the right way.

...dearie me...:rolleyes:
 
Is this now a joke thread.???

If so...this is my current favourite..

3 men go into a pub - an irish man, an aussie and a scouser. They see a guy in the corner who looks like christ so they send him over 3 drinks.

Christ comes over and says to the Irish man -"thank you for the guiness - let me shake your hand" and he does - The irish man says "Begora my arthritis - its cured - thank you lord"

Christ says to the Aussie - "thank you my son for the fosters - let me shake your hand" and he does - aussie says " strewth lord - my back - all my life its pained me - its now cured"

Christ then turns to the scouser and says "thank you my son for the bitter let me........but before he can finish the scouser jumps up and backwards shouting "calm down lord - I'm on disability":D :D
 
Is this now a joke thread.???

Christ then turns to the scouser and says "thank you my son for the bitter let me........but before he can finish the scouser jumps up and backwards shouting "calm down lord - I'm on disability":D :D



it will have to be the scouser won't it? :D
 

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