Caption Competition

markjay

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"So Paddy, let me get this right. You say got a call from 'Kumar from Microsoft Support', and he told you to cut the rails and move the track 6 feet to the East... is that it?"
 

GeeJayW

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Click follows clack follows click follows clack follows oh sh!t...
 

Meldrew2

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"And you say that Brunel's Great Western managed to change the track width throughout their network in a weekend?"

"He didn't have to @&$# around with risk assessments though..."
 

Steveml63

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I think it’s safe to say that this job has gone a bit off the rails
 

PXW

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Look, it’s a straight stretch, the locos will be going at quite a lick, I’m sure they won’t even feel a bump as they go over this.
 

markjay

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After extensive forensic testing, 60 meeting and 25 hearings, 345 witnesses, over a 7 years period, and a budget of £18m, the inquiry finally managed to identify the exact cause of the crash.
 

markjay

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"Can you pop over to the where the railway arches garages are and get Gav from the cut-and-shut place to come over for a sec?"
 

GeeJayW

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All we need is for both teams to line up the left hand track, the right hand track will look after itself...
 

Meldrew2

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"Okay, this is where we will put the chicane"

Huawei get their revenge for being kicked out of the UK's 5G network with their design for HS2.
 

greenmanslk

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anyone got the number for cross rail?
 

markjay

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"No, Mick, you got it all wrong... there's only ONE track... 'HS2' is just a name".
 

ringway

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"You've got the wrong kind of track on the leaves, that's the problem lads."
 

markjay

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"The usual, Kevin. Just make an announcement that the trains are canceled due to 'snow on the tracks' ".
 

Harrythedog

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Some cracking entries
In 3rd place

"Pete, you will never again organise the track day."
In 2nd place paying homage to any old engineers
FFS, how many times have we said 1metre = 39.25 inches not 36!
The winner for a double entry
"Okay, this is where we will put the chicane"

Huawei get their revenge for being kicked out of the UK's 5G network with their design for HS2.
Over to you Meldrew2
 

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