Children (Other people's)

Page may contain affiliate links. Please see terms for details.

davidjpowell

MB Enthusiast
Joined
Nov 8, 2007
Messages
4,923
Location
Doncaster
Car
E350 w212 and Ford Ranger
Need to let off steam, and as all my normal avenues are blocked - this is my only place!

Partners sister came to visit 2 (feels more like 30 days ago), bringing her children from hell. For the past 2 days I have watched my daughters toys get trashed (mother says nothing), my house get wrecked, and we have been tidying constantly.

They wake up at 6.30 and rather than my quiet daughter, wake the whole house up. I exploded after one of the buggers started playing with drums (again mother says nothing).

Middle of the night one of the ****s (sorry kids) caught his foot on the radiator (he was in an inflatable bed). He made such noise that I thought we were off to casualty. Turned out he wanted to get in his mums bed. After waking the whole shrieking like a banshee he walked off to the bed (leaving his mum without run until I sorted out a settee), without a bloody limp.

Weekend ruined, feel shattered and very very grumpy, but not allowed to say anything.:(

If these were my kids I would be too embarrassed to take them anywhere.
 
This lot sound like my neighbours! all six of them!

You sound like a decent parent, it amazes me how many parents let their spawn do anything anywhere and if you dare to complain you get, where you not young once, hmm, go figure.

Time for a breeders license me thinks.
 
You are far too tolerant!
Any kids who stay at our house are told immediately if they do something not acceptable. It establishes boundaries that they must not cross.
Your advantage is that other people's kids don't know how you will react in controversial situations.
 
I feel for you, you cant step in a take hold of the situation if they are not your kids. However it is you and your partner's house. I would be interested in your partner's oppinion on this.
Another option is to take your daughter away on a short break to centre parks or the Zoo when they come over. Your partner's sister may get the message. If anything is said, point out it is safer to see wild animals in controlled conditions (behind bars) than trashing your house and passing on untold bad habbits to your daughter:)

Good luck on this one mate
 
It's a very difficult situation, which we have also been in recently. The problem is that the parents consider the behaviour acceptable/normal, which does make it very difficult to do anything about it. We have three small boys (2, 7, 10) who are no angels, but whenever we have others to stay we realise they really aren't so bad (silver lining?)!
 
I have been in a similar situation of powerlessness as a step parent. However my wife now understands that it is my house too and I am with the kids more than their father. What is more their father is in agreement with me on my reaction when the kids play up.

The eldest lad is worse than the otehrs and leaves the house in a mess. Simple response leave everything he left out piled on his bed, remove access to playstation or PC.
 
Apparently they are going home early, partly I suspect because I shouted at the kids this morning. I should feel guilty, but don't.

I do feel bad for my partner, as she does not see her sister that often.

Fortunately my daughter knows better, and has already realised that they are naughty. I've got various toys etc to repair when they leave.

Still filled with a lot of anger, and biting my tongue.

Edit. Reprieve withdrawn. they are staying.
 
Last edited:
Surely you have some tinkering to do with the car that your daughter could help with this giving you some freedom?
 
Surely you have some tinkering to do with the car that your daughter could help with this giving you some freedom?

I do, and will be doing so. Not sure the daughter is into cars when there are children to play with.
 
Kick em out, and to hell with the consequences.

It is either YOUR house and home or it isn't, if if is, kick em out, if it ain't, move out.
 
have you thought of asking your wife to speak to her sister,maybe your wife feels the same as you,unless you talk to each other ,you wont be able to sort anything for this visit,or future visits
 
have you thought of asking your wife to speak to her sister,maybe your wife feels the same as you,unless you talk to each other ,you wont be able to sort anything for this visit,or future visits

We do. But it is still her sister. It will not be happening again though.

Off to the seaside so they can terrorise some seagulls soon.
 
Children are a bit like animals in that they're much nicer & easier to deal with if you train them properly.
 
Children are a bit like animals in that they're much nicer & easier to deal with if you train them properly.

lol

old devonshire saying

"a woman, a dog and an apple tree, the more you beat em, the better they be."
 
Children are a bit like animals in that they're much nicer & easier to deal with if you train them properly.
Funny you should say that ... Mrs BTB and I both train Border Collies to compete in agility. I think training dogs does teach you the importance of being fair and consistent, and that the best way to achieve an aim is virtually always by positive reinforcement.

Edit: Baby BTB at Crufts last year

pic03.jpg
 
Last edited:
We had a "difficult relative" who's parents would stick her on the computer and playstaion for most of the day (they have since divorced) and this young lady was the angriest hissing thing you could imagine - scary to watch!

When she came to our place, for the first few times her behaviour (especially towards her father) was incredibly bad "don't you talk over me" was one of the things she screamed at her dad!

I put her in her place in front of the whole family on Christmas day a few years ago. Since then I have worked on her and found out what makes her tick.

She recieved little attention at home and IS an intelligent child.

I decided to treat her like one of the gang here (my children rarely misbehave and if they do, one look from me ends it all - not by fear but by respect).

We have a couple of ponds in the garden and I took little "Miss Unruly" to explore these - feeding the fish in the fish pond (now her job every time she stays here) and finding snails, newts, frogs etc in the wildlife pond.

Whilst doing the above I noticed she was holding on to use the toilet. "Go to the toilet" I said, "No, I just want to stay here" she replied as though the moment would be gone forever if she left.

She never had any pets to speak of at home but although afraid at first has come to love our dogs (when I was stroking one of our rescue dogs she actually asked "why do you love him?" :crazy:

It took a while, but she is now a model pupil when at our house, perfectly behaved and a pleasure to have around the place.

All she needed was some love, attention and to be shown the rules of the house.

As BTB says you get out of people/dogs what you put into them.
 
Drop in to my place matey, kettle always on and we will talk about cars and parts and stuff!! (don't bring THEM though, please!!)

B
 
Drop in to my place matey, kettle always on and we will talk about cars and parts and stuff!! (don't bring THEM though, please!!)

B

I would, but am scared of what would happen to my house. One of the buggers has just scratched the Merc.:(

Up for a pint at the Kings anytime you fancy though!
 

Users who are viewing this thread

Back
Top Bottom