Controlled Crying

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Ade B

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First night of 'controlled crying' with 4 month old... Its a miserable feeling, poor little tyke has had us at his beck and call for his entire life so far...

:confused::(

Ade
 
It's horrid doing it, I remeber it as one of the worst nights ever, listening to my daughter sobbing herself to sleep.

But ever since she has gone to bed like a dream, even if she is not quite ready to dose off she quite happily lies there and chats to herself. She is now two and a half and is for the first time in her bed, not the cot. So far not jumped out once. If only that could last....

I hope you get into a routine soon.

David
 
It didn't last long :rolleyes: Mrs B is feeding him at the moment, I think she is crying more than he was...

Will try again tomorrow.


Ade...
 
It didn't last long :rolleyes: Mrs B is feeding him at the moment, I think she is crying more than he was...

Will try again tomorrow.


Ade...
It is hard, but you will find that the time slowly reduces until there is no further need to use the technique.

Our almost 2 year old now watches "In the Night Garden" then tells us his teeth need brushed then asks to go to bed. If only they stayed that way!!!

Stick with it and you will reap the rewards later.
 
which one will give in first my moneys on mum....... these little fragile things are tougher than we think ....... :) don't worry mum will soon be controlled
 
First night of 'controlled crying' with 4 month old... Its a miserable feeling, poor little tyke has had us at his beck and call for his entire life so far...

:confused::(

Ade

Ah those were the days, 29 years ago now, but the memory is still strong, its bl**dy hard but after a couple of nights you get used to the screams:D :D and life becomes peaceful
 
I never held with this practise and never did it with my two. My belief is babies cry for a reason they need you. They do not have the ability to manipulate. All that happens is everyone gets more upset. But it's each to their own and you have to do what's best for you and yours.:D
 
Agree with Pammy. Whilst books are great to read about how to bring up children, when and what to do with them during the early years, all children are so incredibly different.

My daughter who is now 10, slept in her cot in her own room maybe half a dozen times in her life. She spent most of her nights in with me up until I guess the age of 5, maybe 6. I was lucky that she certainly didn't thrash around, but selfishly I got as much sleep as I needed and so did she.

We tried the "put her to bed, leave her to cry" routine, but after several nights of projectile vomit and big time distress for her, clearly it wasn't going to work. So change of tactics and left it to nature taking its course.

Luckily she has been the kind of child (whilst nowhere near an angel) who would go to sleep anywhere and I could simply carry her up to bed. Marvellous. Doesn't suit everyone's lifestyle, but fitted in with mine and I think that's what counts.

She obviously goes to bed very well without any problems, stays in her own bed throughout, has done now for a few years and knocks on my door before entering too which is quite sweet.

We're all different aren't we. Bear with it, but do what you both think is right for your bundle. Try different things because somewhere along the way, something will suit.

Good luck.
 
agree with pammy and natalie when the little darling is ready to sleep she will,until then just grin and make the best of it:D
 
How I remember those days (and nights). Its the hardest part of being a parent.

Now I wonder about where are they when their beds are unslept in the next morning. The worrying doesnt stop. It just shifts around a bit.
 
Well we did it with our second daughter after our first didn't sleep for the first 2yrs (and I'm really only exaggerating *very* slightly) of her life.

2nd daughter got off to a bad start as she had to have a little operation on her stomach when she was a couple of weeks old and she never got into a routine.

No way could we go through the same thing with her so I took a week off work and focused totally (those were the days without email etc) on sorting her out and it worked perfectly.
 
Stick at it it's worth it. We did it for out first baby and soon enough it had the desired effect.

We haven't been so strong with the second one (worried she'll wake up her older brother) and as a result have been having interrupted sleep for several months. BIG MISTAKE

We let her cry last night and she went back to sleep. Bliss. We'll be doing the same again tonight.

If you don't go through with controlled crying you WILL create a rod for your own back.
 
Reading this thread makes me realise how lucky we've been with our youngster (three and a bit months old). He's slept right through since his second night at home.
 
Thanks for all the replies peeps, we did a quick straw poll of friends and got similar conflicting advice :D, I guess it depends on the parents' and little one's character as much as anything..

At the moment Mrs B breastfeeds him to sleep which works well, from what I can gather, its a good idea for him to learn at some point how to go to sleep on his own. As above, when this point is seems to vary from 6 weeks to 6 years and tactics vary...

We're not really going for the discipline thing (ie. you will sleep now as its 8pm exactly) its simply Baby B has so far been a little angel and sleeps more or less through the night, but he's still in our bed, and I'd quite like him to get out ;)

Will update with developments...


Ade
 
but he's still in our bed, and I'd quite like him to get out

Yes, he will when he can walk! :D ;) :devil: and then he'll come back in at 5 in the morning too!!! :p
 
Thanks for all the replies peeps, we did a quick straw poll of friends and got similar conflicting advice :D, I guess it depends on the parents' and little one's character as much as anything..

At the moment Mrs B breastfeeds him to sleep which works well, from what I can gather, its a good idea for him to learn at some point how to go to sleep on his own. As above, when this point is seems to vary from 6 weeks to 6 years and tactics vary...

We're not really going for the discipline thing (ie. you will sleep now as its 8pm exactly) its simply Baby B has so far been a little angel and sleeps more or less through the night, but he's still in our bed, and I'd quite like him to get out ;)

Will update with developments...


Ade
all my 4 girls have always slept in their own beds ,cuddle them to sleep pop them in their cots and they stayed there,got up did feeds put back into own beds,all would sleep through a bomb going off now :D
 
I think our daughter was about 8 months when we let her cry. It felt really mean, but she very quickly got used to it. It was importnat that we knew she did not really nead anything. When she had been waking up she had played with her bottle rather than gobbling it down, so seemed ready to go through the night.

She does still wake up now occasionally, but a quick cuddle and she is happy to go back down. Last night (her first night in a bed) she fell out and was a bit shocked, but has gone down like a lamb tongiht. There;s a bean bag waiting to collect this time!

It really is worth the effort to het into the routine I think. The only time we get into trouble is when Georgina is ill. And hald of me thinks that its only because she knows that she can wrap her daddy round her finger!

David
 
IMHO stick with the controlled crying if you can, we did it with our two, and I can count on one hand how many nights they have spent in our bed, and they are 10 and 6 years old. If they are sick and need comforting, then by all means bring them in, but you need your sleep and everyone gets a better sleep in thier own bed, again IMHO.

Kids need to learn how to get themselves off to sleep, I know some hate the routine, but our kids have benefited from the regular wind-down routine, bath,story,bed and no TV at least 45 minute before bed time,as it makes their little minds spin too much!

Good luck Ade, you'll find your own 'best way', if there was one best rule someone would have made a fortune writing a book about it by now!

Cheers
Simon
 

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