Even more new jokes... (No UK Politics please)

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I've set up a charity that donates used dishwashers to Africans. I'm hoping Bob Geldof will endorse it.


I've called the charity Rinse Aid.
 
Janek was born and raised in Poland, last year he decided to follow his sister Krystyna to the United Kingdom.
Shortly after Janek obtained his official UK registration certificate he fell in love with Sian, and following a whirl-wind romance they were married. Although Janek's English was not perfect, and Sian's first language was Welsh, they got along very well.
One day Janek rushed into a Cardiff Law Firm's office and asked Jones the solicitor to arrange a divorce from Sian. Mr Jones said that getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances, and asked the Pole the following questions:
Janek, have you any grounds?
Yes, an acre of land and nice little home.
No, I mean what is the foundation of this case?
It made of concrete.
I don't think you understand. Does either of you have a real grudge?
No, we have carport, and not need one.
I mean what are your relations like?
Most of my relations still in Poland.
Is there any infidelity in your marriage?
Sian has a hi-fidelity stereo and I have a DVD player.
Does Sian beat you up?
No, I always get up first.
Why then, do you want this divorce?
She going to kill me.
What makes you think that?
I got proof.
What kind of proof?
She going to poison me.
She buy a bottle at chemist and put on my shelf in bathroom.
I can read English pretty good, and it say:- Polish Remover.
 

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