Hanging up the Keys

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davidjpowell

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I'm just watching a program on BBC1 about older drivers hanging up the keys. It's all very interesting, not least as these are issues that we are facing at the moment.

My grandfather is 94 and lives on the South Coast, miles and hours away from any other family member. He's a very intelligent, and responsible person, having been a GP for many years. He knows the value of a life, and for 94, is generally very lucid and capable.

He does however have absolutely no peripheral vision in his right eye. He's had a few close shaves, and it's getting to the stage where the family think he is no longer safe. He disagrees and it soon starts to cause some tensions.

How do you persuade someone? He thinks he is perfectly safe (partly because he goes slow!), and is aware of what not being able to drive would do to his life....

It's all very complicated, and I know I would be equally reluctant to hang up the keys.
 
We have the same issue with Emma's Grandfather. How do you tell them?
 
We have all tried. He just does not want to see it. My aunts have considered calling the Police, although whether they would show interest, or even be able to do anything I don't know. Everyone is reluctant to go down the route.

I personally think a chat with a Traffic Officer might be useful. I suspect where he lives they will be well experienced in dealing with havoc creating elderly drivers.
 
Doesnt the individuals GP have to sign the driving license renewal application?

Maybe speaking to the GP is an appropriate course of action in the first instance.

Thats what we did with an elderly relative. The GP wrote to the DVLA and very quickly he put a stop to the driving... well it would have done had said relative not 'forgotten' that he no longer had a license.

Shortly after we sold his car, off to the second hand car dealer armed with cash he went. :doh:
 
I think elderly people can be very persuasive. In our case opticians are the bigger challenge, but even then he seems to have found one who will assist.

The DVLA are now asking for a specific eye test, which is harder to dodge. But it's less about what they say, and more about what is right, especially if someone is deteriorating during the licence period.
 
Very difficult. Thankfully when my mum lost her eye she decided herself that she didn't want to drive any more, even though technically she still could.

Good summary of the rules here
 
Maybe send him along to driving refresher course such as the one MB run from MB World. Is possible that the instructor might see things that would help convince him that continuing to drive is not a realistic option? Might be £125 well spent for everyone?
 
follow him without his knowledge and video the evidence. if its worth presenting it will outweigh the anger of finding out that he was followed.

I watched the show and it was very reminicent of my converstations with my Grandmother on the same subject. She had a stroke which rendered her disabled for several months so the issue of the car was dealt with at that point. However, prior to the stroke she was adamant that everyone else was driving too fast and everyone else was in the wrong when driving. I sold her car for her and she now has £5k sat in a pot for taxi's. The argument of not having any independance is total rubbish. you just use a different mode of transport. Not to mention zero running costs. Its a win win all round.

I find it scary that elderly people who cannot reverse, stay in a lane, stop at roundabouts are allowed on the road. I know people say youg kids are just as dangerous, however they take risks with their eyes open as apposed to being oblivious to the the world outside on the road. I live in Poole (close to the famous Sandbanks) and the amount of elderly wealthy pensioners driving around in bashed in S-Class's and Jag XJ's is scary. I drink in a pub in the same area and old guy who lives 1 mile from the pub always drives, he leaves a blank cheque behind the bar because he is alway reversing into other people's cars in his S600 V12 Biturbo:eek: its his way of paying for the damage.
I need a new wing on my coupe, tempted to leave it in harms way :D :D just kidding
 
I was anticipating a big battle with my Mum who is 88 and has been a very keen driver for 60 years or so. She lives on her own and has never had an accident (but probably caused a few!) Her eye sight has got much worse recently. In the end I had to take her outside and measure out the required distnce to prove she could not read a number plate. She was very shocked. I then suggested that she should end her driving career on a high note and not wait for a bump (or worse) before being forced or frightened into giving up. Amazingly (she is a very feisty independent woman) she meekly handed me her licence and asked me to send it to DVLA for cancellation.
P.S Just to make sure I have bought her 04 Focus off her which she has owned since new and has done 9500 miles!
 
My grandmother was physically fit but had Alzheimers, so deciding at what point she was no longer fit to drive was quite tricky. In the end we removed the rotor arm from her car :eek:
 
My aunt has Alzheimers and the toughest part of getting her to stop driving was to persuade my uncle and my cousin that someone with deteriorating memory and poor situational awareness shouldn't be driving. After one too many crunch, they agreed. My father's spatial awareness is getting poor, but fortunately having moved into a house in town rather than in the middle of the country, he can travel most places on foot or by bus.

Sometimes I think the biggest part of the battle is the sense that in giving up driving they will become isolated, which if you are in the middle of nowhere is true, so I am glad they moved from somewhere very remote into a place where everything is on the doorstep, which they have found very liberating.
 
My grandmother never had any acidents, but sometimes she couldn't remember where she lived ... which made driving home tricky. But at other times she was fine.
 
My father-in-law had his keys confiscated by his "lady" friend when she got really scared by his driving!
 
The way we got my grandfather to stop was be negineering the vicar a ride with him.

The vicar then had a gentle chat with Alan and they agreed that it was a sensible thing to do to hang up the keys.

The vicar was a responsbile person in his eyes therefore he agreed with him - he ignored us completely - much the same way as I'd ignore a vicar offering that form of advice now!
 
We had the same kind of problem with my dad when he was diagnosed with epilepsy. He was only in his mid 50's.

He had an unblemished driving career and all of a sudden his licence was taken away as the rules at the time were you had to go for 2 years without a fit to be declared as a able driver.

Everyday was an argument as he had driven himself everywhere since the age of 17 and of course he was "daddy" and "dad does all the driving", I really felt for him.

Luckily, he hasn't had a fit for over 3 years and now loves his S-Type Jag...even if it is a piddly 2.5 litre and is gold coloured!!
 
I sold her car for her and she now has £5k sat in a pot for taxi's. The argument of not having any independance is total rubbish. you just use a different mode of transport. Not to mention zero running costs. Its a win win all round.

If the above can be communicated, then the practical aspect is taken care of.
 
The way we got my grandfather to stop was be negineering the vicar a ride with him.

The vicar then had a gentle chat with Alan and they agreed that it was a sensible thing to do to hang up the keys.

The vicar was a responsbile person in his eyes therefore he agreed with him - he ignored us completely - much the same way as I'd ignore a vicar offering that form of advice now!

And at a guess it takes something similar to the above to seal the deal.
 
My parents were sitting in their house one day when an old gent in an Jaguar XJ pulled into their drive, got out of his car and made his way straight into their house.

They were speechless as he came in, sat down, looked around and asked them who they were and why were they in his house. They could see he was very confused and he then got quite upset as he realised his mistake. My mum made him a cup of tea and settled him down. My dad then phoned the police.

They had lived in the house for 11 years but it turns out he had sold it over 25 years ago. He was on his way before the police arrived but they were given the registration number.
 
When I was 20ish I almost got killed by an old guy in an auto Daimler (not his car) when he meant to brake but instead floored the throttle.

It was at the Esso petrol station opposite Machester Apollo Theatre.

I somehow managed to leap into the air and the car hit me with the A pillar (I think) before smashing through the wall and aluminium shop front, finally coming to rest inside the shop itself.

If the car had not made such a roar and squeal as it hurtled towards me I doubt I would have had any chance of escaping.

I remember landing and running at full pelt away from the scene.

A guy at the petrol station ran after me and caught me a few hundred yards away. I could hardly walk back - my legs were a real mess and I had managed to take flight in shock and fear.

Had I not managed to rise above bonnet height I would have been crushed to death.






I did however feel sorry for the old lady in last nights program who had sleep apnea. I think she would still be capable of driving safely.
 

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