I shouldnt laugh but ...

[poormansporsche]

sitting in a traffic jam the other day on the m25 there was a broken down car with 2 ***** posing and taking selfies next to the emergency phone.

My 4 year old asked if I could open her window so I said fine

"NOB" !!!

You can shut it now Daddy .... Oops

 

[Jeff666]

succinct.. love it!!

 

[E55BOF]

Something similar happened to me in about 1978. A Sikh man in a car (a Saab 99, I think, and newer and better than my car then) cut me up entering Mahjacks roundabout in Uxbridge. I muttered "b****y wogs" (remember, this was 1978; that was no more than pretty mild common abuse then), and carried on round the roundabout. As I came abreast of the other car, my little cherub in the back wound down the window, stuck his head out and shouted "b****y wogs b****y wogs b****Y wogs" at the top of his voice. No, of course I wouldn't do it now, and neither would he, but I learnt about small boys from that....

 

[TDE1]

^ Lol, funniest use of the '***' non-swearing thing I've seen yet.

 

[Giantvanman]

Very funny indeed………I wonder where she could have picked that up from?

 

[ItalianTuneUp]

Also, what's funny here is that the bleep-o-meter has blanked out the word bl***y, but left the word w*gs intact

 

[meeeb]

sitting in a traffic jam the other day on the m25 there was a broken down car with 2 ***** posing and taking selfies next to the emergency phone.

My 4 year old asked if I could open her window so I said fine

"NOB" !!!

You can shut it now Daddy .... Oops

You must be very proud.

 

[W4E300]

I was asked by my (at the time) 4 year old son why I had called another driver a "King Plughole". It remains an accepted term of abuse in our family 16 years on.

Sent from my iPad using MBClub UK

 

[E55BOF]

Another of the little cherub's utterances:

We were in the ladies' underwear department of a well-known department store, while his mother was looking for some unmentionables. The saleslady was a Mrs. Slocum type; very refeened. He obviously felt the need to make conversation, so opened with:

"My doggie does big poops". Quite true, but Mrs. Slocum was not amused....

 

[viskiss]

Brilliant!

 

[cinek]

Erm, this needs correcting a tad.

I would be willing to bet £100, that the actual word used was not 'nob' but 'noob', or n00b.

For those who have been born in the dark ages, or haven't got any young kids (or both) - 'noob' is the term often used by kids on online, multiplayer computer games.

As it was explained by my 10 year old, noob is someone with no skills, nor any other good useful attributes, also known as looser. The word can also be associated with hackers.

So in defence of the OP, possibly without his knowledge, the child has not used an obscenity some of you might be referring to.

So, keep up with the time and youths, you noobs

 

[poormansporsche]

Unfortunately it was "nob" and there's nobody else to blame but me !

 

[cinek]

Unfortunately it was "nob" and there's nobody else to blame but me !

Fair enough

 

[E270 Owner]

My 5 year old son explained in detail to the washing machine repairman what was wrong with our 6 week old purchase that never worked correctly from day 1.

" the bl**dy stupid bas**rd computerized f***ng"
takes a breath
"useless sh*t .... ermmm whats the other word you call it mummy ?"

I slipped out the back door with shock and embarrassment ................... I shouldn't laugh but ...














.

 

[Giantvanman]

^Brilliant. Made my day.

 

[Dieselman]

^Brilliant. Made my day.

Brilliant, but very sad.

 

[E270 Owner]

Just an update.....................



He's a fully grown hairy young man now
and a musician in a band (not giving the name of it away on here now lol)
currently touring across Europe,
and his mother returned to the City as well back to her job as an investment banker.

The washing machine man retired to Spain.

In case anyone was worried !!!

 

[the prince]

I've been taking my daughter 13 to football matches for about 4 years. The thing she enjoyed most was the 'songs' for the players and more importantly, for the rival fans. In my view, what goes on at football, stays at football! .......Apart from when we get home and my wife asks about the game. Said daughter usually gives a brief summary of the game and a more wordy summary of my conversations with the ref, usually listing them in order of severity. Ouch!

 

[Druk]

Bette's 5yr old granddaughter getting towed back from the toilet in some fancy German restaurant announced to all and sundry...

"no poo-poo, just fart"!

.

 

[stwat]

:d