Item for sale: Self respect of Ashstead, Surrey

[Satch]

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI....MEWA:IT&viewitem=&item=190133720404&rd=1&rd=1

Background information:

http://www.surreyad.co.uk/news/dorking/2012/2012899/fury_over_home_for_soldiers_relatives

 

[pammy]

Shame on them. Hope they never need such help and support

 

[splang]

Totally agree with you Pammy.

 

[bigk]

Its disgraceful that people 'think' more about their pockets and their front before humanity. In any event I put the word think in inverted commas, as how on earth would their house prices be affected, the only material change to the property would be a wheel chair ramp and what do the residents think the families of injured soldiers will be doing at the house....having all night raves?!?!

This is exactly how people who think they are a cut above react.....like muppets.

 

[robert.saunders]

It's disgusting NIMBYism

 

[glojo]

In fairness we are getting one side of a story which is all about a very emotional subject and I wonder if there might be two sides to it? Buying a large house sounds very nice but is it really necessary? Hopefully our troops will not always been in need of the excellent facilities that are on offer and then what happens to the house? Could they not hire temporary accommodation which could be located on site and then sold when it is no longer needed. That way the families are with their loved ones?

In my time recuperation was done among those in a similar condition, with bucket loads of physiotherapy, games, mucking about and the odd socialising, great times but no families.

Casualties in hospitals though is different and the next of kin should always be cared for and hopefully this is still the case?

Regards
John

 

[robert.saunders]

I accept your comments John, I have read as much as I can about this issue on the web, and the reports in the Daily Mail (yuk) are fairly 1-sided; I just hope that this is resolved and certainly no member of our magnificent armed forces should have to worry over such matters

 

[bigk]

Why do you think the reports are one sided............ maybe bacuse it is difficult to report anything of note/weight/sense/volume in relation to the residents.

I honestly believe that is the reason.

Nearly all the reports have been fair, you cant just put things in, make things up to balance a report out. If there is nothing to say, you cant just say it! The press have been very balanced IMHO.

 

[robert.saunders]

Mebbe I just dislike Daily Mail

 

[glojo]

Why do you think the reports are one sided............ .

I'm simply trying to look at it in a cool and constructive manner. Of course it's a one sided report, there is only one side of the debate and inuendo.

Could you please tell me what relatives we talking about? If it is a married person, are we talking about spouse, mother, father, brother or sister, what about the married persons children or are you considering all of the above? I'm sorry if this question was answered and I missed it, but I like to have some idea of the facts as opposed to opinions of a journalist.

John

 

[bigk]

I'm simply trying to look at it in a cool and constructive manner. Of course it's a one sided report, there is only one side of the debate and inuendo.

Could you please tell me what relatives we talking about? If it is a married person, are we talking about spouse, mother, father, brother or sister, what about the married persons children or are you considering all of the above? I'm sorry if this question was answered and I missed it, but I like to have some idea of the facts as opposed to opinions of a journalist.

John

I'm not sure if those facts have been considered or if so beeen made public. A very valid point though.

My point as to why they are aone sided was not aimed at anyone by the way, it was my own way of gettig the point across! Sorry if it seemed to offend.

 

[glojo]

I'm not sure if those facts have been considered or if so beeen made public. A very valid point though.

My point as to why they are aone sided was not aimed at anyone by the way, it was my own way of gettig the point across! Sorry if it seemed to offend.

Certainly doesn't offend and it's nice to debate these very important issues.

Incidentally I spent 13 weeks in rehab (drove me mad )

Regards
John

 

[bigk]

Certainly doesn't offend and it's nice to debate these very important issues.

Incidentally I spent 13 weeks in rehab (drove me mad )

Regards
John

Were those days spent with your family John, or if not would it have helped? Your opinion on this would be strong?

 

[glojo]

Were those days spent with your family John, or if not would it have helped? Your opinion on this would be strong?

First off from what I have read we are talking rehabilitation and not medical care? When these soldiers are treated in hospital and have been seriously wounded then that is a terrible time for everyone. Thankfully we are discussing the rehab of young people (it was always men in my time )

For those of us that have been in the services the one thing that remains with us is the camaraderie, sense of humour and sky-larking that was always prevalent no matter what the situation and in my very personal opinion during a rehabilitation period we need every one of these asset's. I'm going to say something that is from my personal experience and I FULLY respect the request made by SSAFA

During rehabilitation it is my experience that for PHYSICAL injuries the next of kin can be a hindrance! I have no knowledge of psychiatric problems and will not comment on those too much.

When we first get into a rehab scheme we are in a horrible world that is completely alien to us. One minute we are fit young men at the peak of our career and enjoying life to the full. The next minute we are severely disabled and redundant? (out of our specialist field) Our world has come to an end and we can see no future. What is required is perhaps someone to say there is a different world out there and this is what we need to do to open the gates. In my own very personal opinion our next of kin offer us love, support, friendship and security. These things are not top of the list during rehab and can slow the rehab down. There is no such thing as can't, won't, will not or cannot, nor is there much visible pity or sympathy. It is much better to get a group of people who will support each other, laugh at each others disability's, take the mickey out of each others failures and push the limits of 'can do'.

There will be exceptions and it would appear that SSAFA have decided they want a six bedroomed facility for those exceptional cases, but once you make exceptions then it MIGHT undermine the terrific work being put in by everyone else.

"They have their wife and children here, why can't I have mine, I'm far more disabled than they are!"

My whole day was taken up with numerous activities and at night we let our hair down and laughed off all our failures, we had free telephone access to our families and the time flew by.

I think the problem I suppose is our shrinking armed forces and the closure of military hospitals. I have very strong views on this issue and to me that is a far more important issue, the orthopaedic\surgical wards of a military hospital was NOT the place to be for a prude

So to sum up, I don't believe the next of kin should be accommodated in situ at a rehab centre UNLESS there are exceptional circumstances and the welfare of the majority is taken into account.

I hope I haven't been too controversial, or OTT and I am NOT disagreeing with a policy decision, I am expressing my personal thoughts\experience\opinion.

Regards
John

 

[comports]

Thanks John. Very valuable input.

Fortunately I have not been in that situation but share your thoughts as I have a very good ("life long mate") friend who was. We have spoken at length about these things since and it does seem very true that, whilst having family and friends around are "nice" and "comforting" sometimes they simply remind the injured party of what they are "missing" or "can no longer do" rather than concentrate on "adapting to their "new" life.

It has long been known that ex-forces personell with PTSD that get put back into civvy street can suffer greatly, as people that have not experienced what they have cannot possible comprehend what they are going through. Now I know that's the psychological arena but similar in execution.

Simply being with others in their predicament usually bolsters ones reserve as they are not alone and as you rightly said John if they can laugh at each others "problems" then it just seems to help.

It's always difficult to "balance the facts" but remember news papers do not seem to do this as it becomes "Not really news" by this time and just a discussion.

 

[Godot]

Now removed from EBay