Job Vacancy.

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renault12ts

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Some may have seen this for a Dublin pub:

Oscars Café Bar are currently recruiting for an experienced Snowflake to join our team. We are looking for self-entitled, over sensitive, and passionate individual who has the ability to find and take offense from the most innocuous things imaginable. The ideal candidate does not need to be able to work as part of a team as some of the best work will be done alone, anonymously and from the successful candidate’s bedroom.
Key role aspects:
IT & Social Media Skills
• Extensive experience in using a smartphone required, in fact we expect our candidate to have a smartphone attached to their hand at all times and be able to get through the working day without looking up from phone.

• Be adept at taking selfies throughout the working day. Ability to disregard one’s own safety or that of colleague in the quest of a perfect “selfie” would be desirable. Additionally, being completely insensitive will help, for example taking selfies at funerals, car accidents and any type of personal tragedy

• A thorough knowledge of all current and emerging social media platforms is essential. Your social media “friends” will ideally be like minded individuals who can support your outrage when leaving comments.

• Typing skills are essential as this role will involve ALOT of typing such as leaving one star reviews on Tripadvisor because the server in the Restaurant did not address you with the correct pronoun . Other examples where typing skills are required include copious commenting on social media as well as writing strongly worded letters about all and anything that upset you, and your likeminded outraged social friends.
Process and Systems

• The ability to Drive is desirable as this role will involve driving most normal people mad.

• Experience in jumping on a band wagon will be helpful as is the ability to stay on this bandwagon when the going gets tough!

• A hostile attitude to free speech is expected and the ability to quench and belittle other people’s views will be advantageous.

Communication and Leadership Skills
• Communicating openly and clearly both verbally and in writing.

• Good communication skills are not essential as your emotions will take precedent over all discussions.

• Manage conflict effectively – and my managing it means seeking out conflict and developing further.

• Showing through leadership by inciting others to find offence and be morally outraged.

• Pitching information at the appropriate level taking a multi-platform approach to communicating one’s outrage. Such platforms include but are not limited to the comments section on facebook, broadsheet letter columns, Daily Mail Sad Face articles and the Joe Duffy show

Ideal candidate will possess:
• Maximum of 5 years' Millennial Experience
• Absolutely no resilience whatsoever
• No willingness to consider controversial or opposing views
• Over confidence and naive ambitions
• Self-righteousness and indignation

If you feel you possess the above qualities and qualification then please get in touch immediately. If any part of this Job Advert offends you then you have the job already!
Check out our website on www.oscarscafebar.com to see our lovely Bar and Restaurant located in Smithfield, Dublin 7, Ireland
Smithfield
 
Missed off "Able to cross a busy road without looking up from screen and rant when car manages to brake 5cm from legs"
 
Apparently they had to apologise, some snowflakes took offence at gender pronouns.
 

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