Leaking into trousers

Discussion in 'OT (OFF Topic) Forums' started by brucemillar, Jul 17, 2016.

  1. Druk

    Druk MB Enthusiast

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    See, what you need is one of these:

    [​IMG]

    As worn by this fashion icon and known locally as a 'simmet'.

    [​IMG]


    The best were the ones hand-knitted for your Christmas by your Grannie from a ball of old string.

    [​IMG]

    No water retention problems with them. :rock:







    .
     
  2. John

    John Hardcore MB Enthusiast

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    Yes, I used to see people coming out the dumper trap and just walking straight out the door.

    Happens everywhere I'm sure.

    Rank.
     
  3. WDB124066

    WDB124066 MB Enthusiast

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    Pumpkin seed, cranberries and almonds Bruce, you'll be a changed man! :):)
     
  4. lisa110rry

    lisa110rry Active Member

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    This is just getting funnier and funnier. I on,y for a short time worked in a woman--heavy environment, a University admin block. I was horrified to learn that women would visit the loo and not wash their hands properly after. As a girl, in school, we did that thing about going to the loo, wiping, then putting fingers in agar agar. It would be cultured, very nasty. Always wash hands properly boys! ☺️
     
  5. tylerdurden

    tylerdurden Active Member

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    OK, medical angle

    "Terminal dribbling" is the correct medical terminology. As many men get older their prostates enlarge and can cause this. The urethra does travel through the postate early in its path from the bladder. Other symptoms might include difficulty initiating flow and/or getting up at night to pee.

    If you are getting middle aged or older and this is a regular phenomenon I'd see your doc.

    I think many men leak a final bit of wee after zip up. This may driven by several things.

    Rushing the process. Many men do this at work or other high pressure environments where they don't have the time and feel the need to push the wee out as fast as possible before getting back to their task.

    The other thing , which has been mentioned is the gravity issue. If your zip is riding high, the penis may run upwards for a bit before being held down resulting in a natural pooling of wee effect. This might result in a small leak at zip up time when you drop your tackle back inside. Some meds or drinks may interfere with bladder sphincter relaxation (eg caffeine).

    While this topic has resulted in the expected hilarity its credit to the OP for raising it.

    Its one of those things that many men experience but never really talk about.
     
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  6. WDB124066

    WDB124066 MB Enthusiast

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    Pumpkin seed Bruce, Tell 'em Doc.
     
  7. MD5

    MD5 MB Enthusiast

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    A friend of mine had a problem with this, and also with his stools coming out shaped like chips. The doctor gave him a quick look, and provided a simple fix for the chip problem - he was instructed to cut four inches off his string vest.

    The 'last drip' problem was more complicated, and involved grafting a nasal hair to the end of his penis. When he put it to the test for the first time, he shook it, and just as he was about to put it away, a lost drop came out and trickled along the nasal hair. With that, his penis sniffed it back in.
     
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  8. stwat

    stwat MB Enthusiast

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    A mate of mine talked to me about suffering this issue. He had gone to his doctor but had found no cause or issue as to why health wise.

    I was wearing a pair of button up jeans not long after and found I had the same issue. I realised that not undoing the last button when taking a piss caused the same problem for me. Undoing that last button allowed the member to have more freedom, allowing all trapped piss to flow free.

    I passed that information on to my mate and he never had the problem again. !
     
  9. OP
    OP
    brucemillar

    brucemillar MB Enthusiast

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    Very good advice here. Thank you. For me it does appear to have been the height of the zip that was/is causing the issue. I have to mention here though just how accurate your words are: Since my stomach surgery I do drink drink more. Perfectly normal as I now have a completely revised diet. The bigger and more regular intake of fluids has it's effects, as you rightly point out.

    Thank you again for a great post.
     
  10. parkman1

    parkman1 Active Member

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    Bruce, this is one of the Murphy's Law situations. The mathematical probabilities of the remaining 8 drops of pee running down the inside leg of your trousers are multiplied 12 times in accordance to Neumans' Law of Light and Dark Liquid Staining, and are purely dependant on the colour and material of said trousers.

    With a good quality, heavy wool or tartan pair of "trews" the problem is non-existant. However, with a pair of Marks and Spencers' cream or tan, light cotton trousers one can be guaranteed that the body will unconsciously register this fact, and it will be impossible to prevent the egress of wet willy product onto the said trousers.

    It has also been discovered that dogs and small children will always follow you and point out the wet trousers to all and sundry, by shouting "He's just pee'd his pants, he's just pee'd his pants".

    The answer may be to wear American cowboy chaps, over the trousers, although this may look a little bit suspect in the local shopping centre on a Saturday afternoon.If you decide on this course of action, ensure the you either start or finish every sentence with "Hey-ho, Silver" as this will make you look like an authentic cowboy, and possibly prevent your arrest.

    parkman
     
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  11. lisa110rry

    lisa110rry Active Member

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    [​IMG]

    Have to say I would think chaps would be a retrograde step, focussing attention where it is not wanted in such circumstances...
     
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  12. parkman1

    parkman1 Active Member

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    Yes, on second thoughts, you could be right. Although, if you wore the chaps on the inside you would be providing a natural barrier between the cause of the problem, i.e the "knob", and the recipient, i.e. the trousers. This, in theory, ought to let the aforementioned "wee-wee" disperse naturally down ones' leg, where it should dry up due to bodily heat.

    Again, I would warn practitioners of this solution to be aware of sheep, goats, and even horses, as a random, surprise attacks by any of these hardy chaps can lead to severe injuries, and the possibility of legal actions against you.

    And, to quote Frank Zappa, "Don't eat the yellow snow".

    parkman
     
  13. lisa110rry

    lisa110rry Active Member

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    Happy to assist with the 'chaps' issue (being a long term Yank ex-pat) as I recall having had a cowboy outfit when I was small...
     
  14. parkman1

    parkman1 Active Member

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    hmmmmm...............................

    parkman
     
  15. lisa110rry

    lisa110rry Active Member

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    Bat Masterson outfit Parkman. You can google it.
     
  16. MD5

    MD5 MB Enthusiast

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    Sorry to report that after an unprotected one night stand, my friend now has sniffilis.
     
  17. parkman1

    parkman1 Active Member

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    Yeuch !!!! No more, please, no more. My willy-wonker is trying to shrink, in fear !!

    parkman
     

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