Ode to Sir Clive Woodward or Lord Bald

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Active Member
Feb 6, 2005
Fife, Scotland
There was an old man called Lord Bald
Whose team got completely mauled,
He picked his old mates
For some crucial test dates,
and the fans were truly appalled.

There was a middle-aged tosser named Bald
Who's mates were all English and Auld
First Test: Neil Back
Like the rest of the pack
Had no clue where the line-out was called

Well Woodward he led out a pride
Of Lions of nothing deprived
The team's preparations
Meant only one nation's
Tired old crocks made the side.

Clive said that we all had to learn
Form fades, so we saw the return
Of players retired
Long injured or fired
In a team sponsored by Age Concern

There was a young man called BOD
Who Sir Clive told us was God
But Umaga was bolder
And fecked up his shoulder
Now we all think Sir Clive is a sod!

Under the leadership of Sir Clive
The Lions Headed South in oh five
The team he selected
Left some good players neglected
Now time for Southampton’s demise

Thank God that's the end of the tour
At last we'll show Woodward the door
To Soton he's damned
He ought to be hanged
Condemned by the sour of four.

The best prepared Lions squad ever
Went down under and found they could never
Win when it mattered;
They truly were battered
By a team whose coach was more clever

And the best (but I'm biased):

The view it seems had been aired
That the team were extremely prepared.
But I'm very glad
That all of Gwlad!
Said what no journalist dared.

www.gwladrugby.com Welsh Rugby Online.

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