Punch Up


Jun 2, 2002
West London
SL500 & The Fart Car
I remember once a few years ago,  I was up in town on the motorcycle, it was dark and pouring with rain. There I was, minding my own business when a car came up along side me on the inside and then proceeded to move out forcing me into the path of oncoming traffic.

I managed to slam on the brakes and drop back behind the car in question, missing the oncoming car by a fraction of a second.

Anyway I pulled up alongside the offending car at the next set of lights to verbally express my anger with his standard of driving.

I thought I was being quite polite considering the chap had very nearly caused me to have a head on collision with someone at a combined speed of about 70mph. I kept my cool, I didn’t even swear but this chap was obviously spoiling for a fight.

No sooner had I opened my mouth, than he leapt out the car and started hitting me. I struggled to put the bike on its stand as I was being repeatedly belted around the head and body. However, I was *still* wearing a crash helmet and underneath my waterproofs I was wearing leathers with full body armour with back, shoulder, chest and kidney protection  built into it. So I thought as long as he doesn’t try to kick me in the groin, I was going to be fine.

This loony continued his onslaught regardless and within a few punches I noticed that there was now blood appearing on my visor (presumably from his hands). Cool I thought….this is fun – this guy is so dumb he’s going to beat himself up all on his own. The head punches suddenly stopped and turned to body punches. Aha, he’s hurting I surmised. He continued with a frenzy of body punches, only interspersed by the occasional head punch here and there. I positioned my hands to protect my privates and let him continue and I was by now beginning to chuckle to myself, knowing what my next course of action would be.

The punches started slowing – he was getting tired now. I waited for a pause, opened the visor (which by now was covered in blood) got my bearings and gave him an absolute cracker of a Glasgow Kiss.  He went down and stayed down.

As I climbed back on the bike, I took a quick glance at the chap who was now sitting with his head buried in his hands….not that I could see his hands for all the blood.

I often wondered if this chap learnt something that night ….I somehow doubt it other than next time he'd probably use a knife instead.

Moral of the story?

Wear Kevlar <img src="http://www.mbclub.co.uk/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/exclamation.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':exla:'>


MB Enthusiast
Jun 1, 2002
Berkshire & London
C292 GLE63s Coupe + R230 SL55 + E88 BMW
Absolute Quality mate................Don't know if I could have kept my rag for that long though.......
My hats goes off to you......


Active Member
Jul 7, 2002
Lordswood, Kent.
Ford 2.3 Galaxy
I used to ride bikes, so I know what it's like &nbsp; <img src="http://www.mbclub.co.uk/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/sad.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':('> &nbsp;but I would of paid to have seen that &nbsp; <img src="http://www.mbclub.co.uk/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':D'> &nbsp;<img src="http://www.mbclub.co.uk/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':D'>

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