The don't reply to my reply thread

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Noticed lately people's asking questions about this and that, get a couple of good replies and then dissappear into the ether. At least say thanks i've sorted it.
Agreed, see also similar thread currently running
 
I'm a bit more philosophical about it. Yes, of course it's kind and good manners to reply saying yes or no, it did or didn't fix it, but I find a very large number of people are selfish, unkind and have no manners.

It's a bit like letting people out at busy junctions when you are impeding their way (unkind selfish people still won't help you out the other way around), opening doors for people (when the recipient blanks you and others let the door almost slam in your face), saying hello when out and about locally in the countryside.

These are all thing I do because I try to live my life being kind to others where I can. I do it because I think society (or this forum) are a better place as a result, and I'm not going to let what I will just generalise as 'self absorbed takers' detract from what I think are positive values in myself.

If we all fell to the level of the selfish takers, society would be in a much worse place.

I have thought about 'not helping' (generally) as a result of the selfish takers, but I've managed to accept that is how it is, but I was thinking if I was going to continue to let it annoy me, I'd be better off not helping just to be at more peace with myself.


But yes, I haven't found Buddhist monk zen yet quite yet, so I still find it a bit annoying! 😄
 
Totally agree there MrGreedy

I now make effort to ensure I always post my results if I have a problem and the great people on this forum have helped me out. Its good manners, even though it seems a lot of people don't..
 
On some of those that 'disappear' I am genuinely interested in how the problem was solved as it would remain on here on record for future reference. Very annoying when they just disappear.

Can the mods not send them an e-mail politely asking for the answer ?
 
It would not exactly be a thousand emails , we only have a one or two who disappear each month at the most .
 
I'm a bit more philosophical about it. Yes, of course it's kind and good manners to reply saying yes or no, it did or didn't fix it, but I find a very large number of people are selfish, unkind and have no manners.

It's a bit like letting people out at busy junctions when you are impeding their way (unkind selfish people still won't help you out the other way around), opening doors for people (when the recipient blanks you and others let the door almost slam in your face), saying hello when out and about locally in the countryside.

These are all thing I do because I try to live my life being kind to others where I can. I do it because I think society (or this forum) are a better place as a result, and I'm not going to let what I will just generalise as 'self absorbed takers' detract from what I think are positive values in myself.

If we all fell to the level of the selfish takers, society would be in a much worse place.

I have thought about 'not helping' (generally) as a result of the selfish takers, but I've managed to accept that is how it is, but I was thinking if I was going to continue to let it annoy me, I'd be better off not helping just to be at more peace with myself.


But yes, I haven't found Buddhist monk zen yet quite yet, so I still find it a bit annoying! 😄
Thank you for a great post.

It's fascinating how we react to responses, and lack of responses. I do wonder whether or not there are times when someone joins the forum with a query, gets some helpful advice, resolves the issue, then thinks to themselves "I must pop back to say thank you." But of course most of us think of things we must do, but never get around to it. They may not be "selfish, unkind and have no manners", they may just be forgetful. :dk:

But when someone fails to acknowledge your courtesy out in the real world, I agree that it's annoying. You would think that a wave of thanks would be easy if not close enough to actually use the words, and fortunately most do. Even a smile and the mouthed words "thank you" are good. It's just a tiny bit of appreciation for someone doing something small for you. Getting those sort of responses makes me feel good, makes me want to do it again. I sometimes wonder whether I briefly turn into a selfish ogre and refuse to let someone out of a side road shortly after having been blanked from someone I did let out. Perhaps the driver who seemingly deliberately blocks my route has just suffered the same themselves?

But am I reading too much into it? I think it may be a cultural thing. To my mind, many Americans appear to go overboard with their verbal appreciation of the most minor good deed. But that's still preferable to being completely ignored. At the other extreme, some cultures rarely express their thanks. Interestingly, my wife is from a Buddhist culture and they rarely thank people (or apologise!). Yet she and her countryfolk are the most generous people you could ever hope to meet. They would do anything for anyone, without expecting a hint of appreciation. I suppose if it's not expected they don't risk getting upset when it doesn't happen.

However, I'm far too old to start aiming for such levels of calm. When someone walks past me without any acknowledgement when I'm holding a door for them, I'll still throw the door shut in the hope it thumps into their ar5e. When someone completely blanks me when I've stopped to let them pass some parked cars, I'll still shout "THANK YOU" in a futile attempt to teach them some manners. :mad:
 
It's fascinating how we react to responses, and lack of responses. I do wonder whether or not there are times when someone joins the forum with a query, gets some helpful advice, resolves the issue, then thinks to themselves "I must pop back to say thank you." But of course most of us think of things we must do, but never get around to it. They may not be "selfish, unkind and have no manners", they may just be forgetful. :dk:
That's where my thinking is at - for some at least.
The ones that arrive in a bit of a tizz, sometimes a little short tempered due to the urgency of their need to get their car fixed and fearful of what it's going to cost them, they get the answer they need than beetle off to get the repair done. Car fixed, they resume normal life as they know it and never quite get round to reporting back.

Often enough there's no real need either. The solution presented must have worked or they'd have returned with more questions.
Can't talk for others but I help where I can just to help - not for praise.
 
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“Ingratitude, thou marble hearted fiend”

King Lear. Shakespeare.
 
Noticed lately people's asking questions about this and that, get a couple of good replies and then dissappear into the ether. At least say thanks i've sorted it.
Unfortunately it's all about "take" but with no "give".
 

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