The things children say

ChrisEdu

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My 11 year old has just informed my wife and I that a dildo is an extinct bird! :eek: I'm not sure what they're teaching them in school these days?!
 

Happytalk73

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When my wife was opening her Christmas present from me (small item wrapped over and over again) our 10 year old daughter exclaimed

"Daddy's renowned for his over-wrapping isn't he Mum?"

Not a funny thing but we thought it was a great word for her to use in the correct context. I really struggle with spelling and grammar. She must get it from my wife.

Ant.
 

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As a child, I took a lot of telling that saying to my parents and anyone who'd listen that "I've been outside playing with myself" was not accurate :eek:
 

NDFR

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Playing with my 4 year old Grandaughter a few weeks ago the conversation went like this.

Granddaughter 'Guess what'?
Me 'What'?
Granddaughter 'You're my best friend'.

My eye leaked a bit.
 
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AMGeed

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Playing with my 4 year old Grandaughter a few weeks ago the conversation went like this.

Granddaughter 'Guess what'?
Me 'What'?
Granddaughter 'You're my best friend'.

My eye leaked a bit.
Kids can do that, just when you're not expecting it.
 

Pontoneer

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I've related this one before , but taking my young son on the train down to Ayr we passed numerous golf courses , my son saw several groups of golfers and asked what they were doing , so I explained they were playing golf with their friends .

Then Harris spotted a lone golfer and piped up loudly " Look daddy , that man's got no friends " . The entire carriage heard and erupted into laughter :D
 

Pontoneer

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Oh , the other one , this time on the train with his mum : a bald man sat down opposite them , so he pointed and said loudly " Mr Potato Head " .

I don't know who was more embarrassed ( Harris was only three or so at the time ) .
 
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ChrisEdu

ChrisEdu

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I've related this one before , but taking my young son on the train down to Ayr we passed numerous golf courses , my son saw several groups of golfers and asked what they were doing , so I explained they were playing golf with their friends .

Then Harris spotted a lone golfer and piped up loudly " Look daddy , that man's got no friends " . The entire carriage heard and erupted into laughter :D
Reminds me of watching a bloke playing / showing off with his remote control power boat on a river. He hit a wake and the boat flipped over, out of reach of the owner. As I stood sniggering, a child stood, pointing at the boat and laughing out loud in true Nelson from the Simpsons style.
 

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My wife's Infant school - mostly populated by children of Indian and Pakistan descent - conducted an 'Enterprise Week' for Year 2 children.

Making a profit was one key feature of the exercise.

When the teacher asked the children if they could explain what was meant by a 'profit', one child responded: "It's a man dressed in a white suit" - and most of the children nodded in agreement.
 
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ChrisEdu

ChrisEdu

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Heard in a Yr5/6 class: If we store books in a library; food in a store; cars at a garage; what do you think we find in a granary?

Answer: grannies! (What else?!)
 

Happytalk73

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My 11 year old daughter has just told me of an invention that her & her boyfriend have come up with. This is going to make them both famous, a house to die for and a Lamborghini for him:

"Dad" she said, "imagine a car wash, just like the one at Tesco. Well, imagine one of those for horses, a Horse Wash!" :eek:

Dragons Den here we come. :bannana:

Ant.
 

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to swmbo when she was teaching:

Mrs Brown, if them dinosaurs weren't extinct would they kneel down and let you pat them?
 

Happytalk73

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Mrs Ant's just reminded me about when our daughter (4 at the time) said, "Nanna, why is your nose purple?" To my whisky drinking elderly mother.
 

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