The things children say

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ChrisEdu

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My 11 year old has just informed my wife and I that a dildo is an extinct bird! :eek: I'm not sure what they're teaching them in school these days?!
 
When my wife was opening her Christmas present from me (small item wrapped over and over again) our 10 year old daughter exclaimed

"Daddy's renowned for his over-wrapping isn't he Mum?"

Not a funny thing but we thought it was a great word for her to use in the correct context. I really struggle with spelling and grammar. She must get it from my wife.

Ant.
 
As a child, I took a lot of telling that saying to my parents and anyone who'd listen that "I've been outside playing with myself" was not accurate :eek:
 
Playing with my 4 year old Grandaughter a few weeks ago the conversation went like this.

Granddaughter 'Guess what'?
Me 'What'?
Granddaughter 'You're my best friend'.

My eye leaked a bit.
 
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Playing with my 4 year old Grandaughter a few weeks ago the conversation went like this.

Granddaughter 'Guess what'?
Me 'What'?
Granddaughter 'You're my best friend'.

My eye leaked a bit.

Kids can do that, just when you're not expecting it.
 
As a child, I took a lot of telling that saying to my parents and anyone who'd listen that "I've been outside playing with myself" was not accurate :eek:

Not accurate, or not true ?
:D
 
I've related this one before , but taking my young son on the train down to Ayr we passed numerous golf courses , my son saw several groups of golfers and asked what they were doing , so I explained they were playing golf with their friends .

Then Harris spotted a lone golfer and piped up loudly " Look daddy , that man's got no friends " . The entire carriage heard and erupted into laughter :D
 
Oh , the other one , this time on the train with his mum : a bald man sat down opposite them , so he pointed and said loudly " Mr Potato Head " .

I don't know who was more embarrassed ( Harris was only three or so at the time ) .
 
I've related this one before , but taking my young son on the train down to Ayr we passed numerous golf courses , my son saw several groups of golfers and asked what they were doing , so I explained they were playing golf with their friends .

Then Harris spotted a lone golfer and piped up loudly " Look daddy , that man's got no friends " . The entire carriage heard and erupted into laughter :D

Reminds me of watching a bloke playing / showing off with his remote control power boat on a river. He hit a wake and the boat flipped over, out of reach of the owner. As I stood sniggering, a child stood, pointing at the boat and laughing out loud in true Nelson from the Simpsons style.
 
My wife's Infant school - mostly populated by children of Indian and Pakistan descent - conducted an 'Enterprise Week' for Year 2 children.

Making a profit was one key feature of the exercise.

When the teacher asked the children if they could explain what was meant by a 'profit', one child responded: "It's a man dressed in a white suit" - and most of the children nodded in agreement.
 
Heard in a Yr5/6 class: If we store books in a library; food in a store; cars at a garage; what do you think we find in a granary?

Answer: grannies! (What else?!)
 
My 11 year old daughter has just told me of an invention that her & her boyfriend have come up with. This is going to make them both famous, a house to die for and a Lamborghini for him:

"Dad" she said, "imagine a car wash, just like the one at Tesco. Well, imagine one of those for horses, a Horse Wash!" :eek:

Dragons Den here we come. :bannana:

Ant.
 
to swmbo when she was teaching:

Mrs Brown, if them dinosaurs weren't extinct would they kneel down and let you pat them?
 
Mrs Ant's just reminded me about when our daughter (4 at the time) said, "Nanna, why is your nose purple?" To my whisky drinking elderly mother.
 

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