D
Deleted member 149005
Guest
You haven’t failed - try to banish those thoughts.
Follow along with the video below to see how to install our site as a web app on your home screen.
Note: This feature may not be available in some browsers.
Thanks for the kind comments. I have failed, but i can hold my head high in mums presence knowing I went down fighting to do the right thing.
As for work, building sites are starting to open and being experienced, shouldn’t be long before I’m on site. In the meantime, will shovel sh1t for a wage if a jobs offered.
sooner or later I’ll no doubt see the light at the end of the tunnel, and being rock bottom should mean that the only way is up.
So sorry to hear about your mum ; perhaps some small comfort that it sounds like it all happened very quickly , so no prolonged period of suffering . I lost my mum just under 2 years ago so it is still fresh in my mind .My mum died a couple of weeks ago after a fall at home. She was chirpy after an op to fix her leg, but deteriorated that night. She had other things wrong with her and was told by the registrar there was nothing more they could do. She died peacefully surrounded by me and my brothers. Before she died she made us all promise 2 things. One, we shared everything equally and two, we stuck together as brothers. We got together as we always do when there is trouble and gave her the most beautiful send off with all the family present. To say I’m devastated is an understatement , but then to find out my mums accounts and all her cash and valuables gone and my brothers have killed their landline and mobile numbers has left me reeling with shock. If greed is what they want, keep the money, but I’m hurt that they promised her dying wishes only to betray her.
Why?????
Indeed : if there was a will , then the estate should be divided according to it ; if she died intestate then the estate ( after funeral costs etc have been deducted ) should be divided equally between you and your brothers ( assuming you are the only heirs ) .Sorry for your loss.
Do you have any family or mutual friends who may be able to speak with them for you and explain to them how this has left you feeling?
Not sure where you stand legally if the have helped themselves to the estate but I’d get some legal advise ASAP.
If they have cut you off completely you may as well go after what is rightfully yours.
Remember you have plenty of friends on here who will help you.
Indeed , to echo what Smart320 said ; what your brothers have done is to disrespect your mother's wishes , so challenging them legally could be viewed as sticking up for , and enforcing , your mother's wishes , not getting something for yourself .Condolences for the loss of your mother. Mine died suddenly at the age of 94 just over a year ago and once I got over the shock of her death discovered she had changed her will about 2 months before she died ( using her solicitor who had worked for her for over 40 years ) and left her not insubstantial estate split equally between myself and two sisters . Apparently my youngest sister had been left 90% in the previous will so I was not surprised when she decided to try challenge the will. Like your siblings she cut off all contact and so over a year later we are still not able to finalise her estate as she has until very recently refused to communicate with either the solicitor who my mother appointed as executor or even the one she instructed to challenge the will. For many family members money is more important than family ties.
I also advise you to take legal advice, remember your mother wanted you all to share her estate and while you may feel the financial aspect is not important what has happened since her death is not what she would have wanted. Your trust and previous relationships with your brothers cannot be recovered however much you might like to turn the clock back so do not let them treat you without respect , I wish you luck whatever you decide
Athey , apologies that I'm only reading this thread now , and have commented ( late ) above to some of your earlier posts .I’ve failed! Not been on for a while, as had all this to deal with, and now to add insult, I’ve been made redundant. Talk about things coming in threes.
It’s been a very hard nearly 4 months now and it’s taken a huge toll on both my physical and mental health. Still in a very dark place and finding it hard to just get through the day.
Now the race begins to find work asap, I am 8 weeks ahead on my rent and just paid the water bill for the year.
My biggest worry is the car, as I don’t want to lose it. I will speak to finance company to get a 3 month break in my payments and all being well I should be working by then. If I get work till Xmas and throw everything at it I can pay it off by then. Just spent nearly a k on it buying new back tyres, rear suspension springs, new subframe bushes and a new brake servo, and I can’t afford to lose 9k if I hand it back, and as my mum helped me get the Lexus which I px’d towards it, it holds a lot of sentimental value.
Ive lost my mum and my brothers, and my job, think that’s enough to lose, and the plan is to restore the car in memory of mum.
For those who have lost family recently, my heart goes out to you and I do know some of the emotions you are feeling.
Anyway, thought I’d let you know I’m still around but won’t be active on here much for a while.
Gary
As someone who has recently suffered two different people’s suicides - don’t think for one second that the pain goes away if you take your own life, you just pass it on to those left behind.How do I cope day to day some of you may ask yourselves, my answer is I don’t know. If it wasn’t for my wife and kids I’d have taken my own life, but I’m still here fighting more for them than myself.
As said, opportunities will arise and at some point I will emerge from this darkness and be even better as a person as I am now.
Hey Brother, time is a healer, lot my little sister early March....
We use essential cookies to make this site work, and optional cookies to enhance your experience.