Recent content by Bear

Big Un told me the sad news about Ringway over the weekend, nice fella, my condolences to his family and friends.

His car was eventually sold and now resides in Ireland.

I was very sorry to hear of the passing of your father.

A doctor who was a cardiac specialist had died, and at his funeral, per his request, his coffin was placed in front of a huge model of the human heart. When the minister had finished the sermon and the funeral was concluded, and everyone had said their final goodbyes, the heart opened up, the...

Two chaps getting dressed at the gym, one is putting on lace knickers. "Since when do you wear womens panties?" "Since my wife found them in the glove compartment!"

A man approached the window of a movie theatre with a chicken on his shoulder and asked for two tickets. "Who's the other ticket for?" the ticket girl asked. "For my pet chicken." He said, pointing to the bird. "I'm sorry," the girl tells him, "but we don't allow animals in the...

A teacher asks the class to name something that ends with "tor" and eats things. So the first little boy says, "Alligator.""Very good Robert, that's a big word."The second boy says, "Predator." "Yes, that's another big word, Tommy. Well done."Little Johnny says, "Vibrator. "After nearly falling...

What is an aircraft blonde? A woman who peroxides her hair, but still has a black box

A man is stumbling through the woods, totally drunk, when he comes upon a preacher baptizing people in the river. He proceeds to walk into the water and subsequently bumps into the preacher. The preacher turns around and is almost overcome by the smell of alcohol, whereupon he asks the drunk...

A five year old girl goes to the hospital with her grandmother to visit her Grandpa. When they get to the hospital, she runs ahead of her Grandma and bursts into her Grandpa's room "Grandpa, Grandpa," she says excitedly, "As soon as Grandma comes into the room, make a noise like a frog!"...

A parish priest saved a choirboys life last week.......he found a lump on his balls.

This any good John? Mercedes w124 E300D LHD For Sale in Clare : ?3,500 - DoneDeal.co.uk

A woman had been after her husband for several weeks to varnish the wooden seat on their toilet. Finally, he got around to doing it while she was out. After finishing, he left to take care of another matter before she returned. She came in and undressed to take a shower. Before getting in...

please delete

Mikolas, a middle-aged Greek tourist on his first visit to Orlando, Florida, finds the red light district and enters a large brothel. The madam asks him to be seated and sends over a young lady to entertain him. They sit and talk, frolic a little, giggle a bit, drink a bit, and she sits on...