Satch
MB Enthusiast
- Joined
- Nov 24, 2003
- Messages
- 3,508
- Location
- Surrey
- Car
- S211 E320Cdi Avantgarde Estate & Toyota Land Cruiser
This morning (06.15) the outside temperature display went from 13C (garage) to -7.5C driving through some open country. That is the lowest I have ever seen in this part of the world.
Doubtless hardy Northern types and mountain men will scoff, but down here in darkest Surrey this represented a challenge for many. So as I was listening to coverage of the Oscars (Well done Clint) I shall give my own award out
The 2005 Award for:
Not Knowing Ice is made from Water
If in freezing conditions you are driving towards an area where water is flowing out from the pavement on to the road as the result of a burst pipe and is then being tracked up and down the road by passage of vehicles, most would think it wise to assume that there is going to be ice around. But not the true artist.
The award goes to:
The baseball cap wearing moron in the Nissan pickup decked out with poncy red/pink metallic paint job, drug dealer alloys, extra lights, chrome sidebars and every other bit of crap poser kit you can possibly get.
For:
Prolonged blowing of horn followed by a sudden attempt to overtake the car in front of you which has been driving carefully and slowly driving out of the water onto an icy surface.
This superb performance was marked by your artful bouncing off the kerb on the wrong side of the road before sliding with the greatest of ease into the side of the car you were trying to overtake.
The crowning point was then to get out of the car and hurl abuse and the victim of your stupidity, kick his car several times and threaten him with violence before you notice the slag in the passenger seat is screaming at you to stop it as you dont need more no more fffing trubbell.
The jury felt your graceful exit by jumping back into your chavmobile and slithering off down the road deserves special mention. The ironic touch of gaining some more traction and showing your lack of care for material things by letting your nearside alloys grind along the kerb for a while was superb.
No serious damage done to the victim but one of the few times I have stopped and given my details as a witness. Nothing winds me up more than stupid bolshy chav cretins in bad cars.
Doubtless hardy Northern types and mountain men will scoff, but down here in darkest Surrey this represented a challenge for many. So as I was listening to coverage of the Oscars (Well done Clint) I shall give my own award out
The 2005 Award for:
Not Knowing Ice is made from Water
If in freezing conditions you are driving towards an area where water is flowing out from the pavement on to the road as the result of a burst pipe and is then being tracked up and down the road by passage of vehicles, most would think it wise to assume that there is going to be ice around. But not the true artist.
The award goes to:
The baseball cap wearing moron in the Nissan pickup decked out with poncy red/pink metallic paint job, drug dealer alloys, extra lights, chrome sidebars and every other bit of crap poser kit you can possibly get.
For:
Prolonged blowing of horn followed by a sudden attempt to overtake the car in front of you which has been driving carefully and slowly driving out of the water onto an icy surface.
This superb performance was marked by your artful bouncing off the kerb on the wrong side of the road before sliding with the greatest of ease into the side of the car you were trying to overtake.
The crowning point was then to get out of the car and hurl abuse and the victim of your stupidity, kick his car several times and threaten him with violence before you notice the slag in the passenger seat is screaming at you to stop it as you dont need more no more fffing trubbell.
The jury felt your graceful exit by jumping back into your chavmobile and slithering off down the road deserves special mention. The ironic touch of gaining some more traction and showing your lack of care for material things by letting your nearside alloys grind along the kerb for a while was superb.
No serious damage done to the victim but one of the few times I have stopped and given my details as a witness. Nothing winds me up more than stupid bolshy chav cretins in bad cars.
Last edited:
