Near crash

[KillerHERTZ]

Tonight I was driving along, and I notice the windows were really steaming up even though I had the heater on.

Then I noticed that the vents had been shut (service last week) so I opened them both while I was driving along.

About a mile or so down the road I feel only what I can discribe as a peanut in my hand.

As I look down a fecking massive spider is having a party on my hand! As im sh!t scared of them I threw it up, & down it falls on my lap causing me to swirve lanes nearly hitting another car...


Thats the last time I open the vents at night...

 

[Thmsshaun]

I shouldn't but

 

[pammy]

eeeeeeeeeeuw eeeeeeeeeuw eeeeeeeeeeeuw - that has got my skin crawling. See and people will try to tell you they are harmless yet they lie in wait for you

I hate spiders too and would have done exactly the same thing - except prob hit the other car

 

[ChloeFox]

I'd probably have done the same

 

[grasmere]

LOL . . . so this spider was telling his mate - "there I was minding my own business and I woke up to find this HUGE ugly bloke stuck to my feet, I jumped up and down and tried to shake him off . . . "

glad you're ok

 

[Shude]

As I look down a fecking massive spider is having a party on my hand! As im sh!t scared of them I threw it up, & down it falls on my lap causing me to swirve lanes nearly hitting another car...

I had this for a fortnight after selling those bumpers to you! It was the snail-trails over the dashboard that annoyed me the most

 

[KillerHERTZ]

I forgot to mention I pulled over and managed to stamp on it while it was still on the floor mat.

Now theres a large trail of sticky crap over the floor

 

[glojo]

I forgot to mention I pulled over and managed to stamp on it while it was still on the floor mat.

Now theres a large trail of sticky crap over the floor

Bully!!! Frit of spiders........... What a whoooze

I have just been reading a thread about SLK drivers being 'hairdressers' I wonder if hairdressers are frit of these poor defenceless creatures that get to wear a size 10 boot merely because they are a spider.

This looks like a blatant case for the National Union for the Protection of Spiders. How do you know the spider had not claimed squatters rights? It clearly got into your car through an insecure orifice, it had taken up residence and you have clearly failed to give it any form of written notice to quit. Instead you blatantly, and maliciously stomped on its head!! Now there may be thousands of lttle baby orphan spiders all hiding in your ventilation system, waiting for the day when they become of age and develop a nasty venom that they can inject into your nasty murdering hide

When you finally make that last journey to the big 'web' in the sky I hope you have a better excuse to offer the Spider in Charge of the Pearly Gate??

You should change your username from KillerHERTZ to KillerSPIDER

Regards,
John the Mygalomorphae

Oh and have a nice day.... You, you... murderer

 

[Satch]

I like my door mirror spider, which has grown over the past months from cute to slightly alarming size. Sometimes sits on its web until I get to about 30 mph when it scuttles to safety behind the mirror.

But it would be so welcome in the car!

 

[Mr E]

Was watching "Pimp My Ride" the other night - AMC Pacer.......

Very amusing to watch the macho guys running from the live rat behind the dash.......

 

[andy_k]

I love the way you are describing the spider. I'm not sure how many of our native spiders fall into the "Massive" category but I don't think there are that many of them

Obviously you were very unlucky and got the only massive spider in Britain that could sneak it's way through the little gap in the vents

Glad you are OK though - have a rep point or two and thanks for a good laugh


Andy

 

[mergli]

I love the way you are describing the spider. I'm not sure how many of our native spiders fall into the "Massive" category but I don't think there are that many of them

With regards to spiders 'massive' is a relative term meaning anything over an inch and a half or so in leg span . We get some jockers (again a relative term ) in our house and I have to catch them and put them out as the wife won't let me kill 'em.

I got a spider catching device (from bettaware I think) which is like a perspex pyramid with a sliding bottom on a long stick so I don't have go anywhere near them (can't do the glass/paper thing at all).

 

[KillerHERTZ]

Here is an artist impression:

I was about the size of a Chrome Centre cap Im scared to drive now

 

[DITTRICH]

I like my door mirror spider, which has grown over the past months from cute to slightly alarming size. Sometimes sits on its web until I get to about 30 mph when it scuttles to safety behind the mirror.

But it would be so welcome in the car!

Such an enterprising spider . It has clearly decided to take the web to the insects rather than waiting for the insects to come to it!
Les

 

[glojo]

With regards to spiders 'massive' is a relative term

A spider is deemed 'Big' when you can either hear it breathing or even worse..... walking.

Many years ago I took my young niece to a friends house to see some baby tarantula's. My friend offered to put one onto her opened hand.

She asked me if it okay and I courageously said it was. After a few minutes the spider was put back into its glass aquarium where it immediately pounced upon a blue-bottle. This made my niece jump, but I congratulated her on her bravery, and she stated she only done it because I had!!!

All was well until I said there was no way I would let a tarantula crawl over my hand. Her mother (my elder sister was not impressed ).

John

 

[scumbag]

Bully!!! Frit of spiders........... What a whoooze

I have just been reading a thread about SLK drivers being 'hairdressers' I wonder if hairdressers are frit of these poor defenceless creatures that get to wear a size 10 boot merely because they are a spider.

This looks like a blatant case for the National Union for the Protection of Spiders. How do you know the spider had not claimed squatters rights? It clearly got into your car through an insecure orifice, it had taken up residence and you have clearly failed to give it any form of written notice to quit. Instead you blatantly, and maliciously stomped on its head!! Now there may be thousands of lttle baby orphan spiders all hiding in your ventilation system, waiting for the day when they become of age and develop a nasty venom that they can inject into your nasty murdering hide

When you finally make that last journey to the big 'web' in the sky I hope you have a better excuse to offer the Spider in Charge of the Pearly Gate??

You should change your username from KillerHERTZ to KillerSPIDER

Regards,
John the Mygalomorphae

Oh and have a nice day.... You, you... murderer

It is not murder, killing spiders, it is merely natural selection. nature allows the weak to be squashed into a pulp by the strong, eventually they will be exstinct. I have to say I cannot wait for the spider presevation society to start. no doubt it will be full of of Panda lovers with no more Pandas to look after.
whatever happens dont let your dog chase a spider, you will be in contravention of one of them hunting bills. I have checked, it makes no allowance for the chasing of spiders. you have been warned.
B****dy do-gooders again.

ps. SLK= Hate spiders! squash them all i say!

 

[glojo]

ps. SLK= Hate spiders! squash them all i say!

When I return back to this earth as a man eating spider YOU are first on my 'eat' list.

One dark night when you are navigating a dark windy narrow country lane in your clapped out Japanes Shogun you will be gobbled up...... Your days are numbered. Tarantula's are at this very minute spreading the word. The days to the revolution are numbered.

Regards, and take care,
John the Mygalomorphae

 

[scumbag]

One dark night when you are navigating a dark windy narrow country lane in your clapped out Japanes Shogun you will be gobbled up......
Regards, and take care,
John the Mygalomorphae

I have already decided that I shall not be needing the shogun for my own personnal use. so unless you have SLK eating spiders in your armoury............i dont want to know really. am hiding already

 

[glojo]

so unless you have SLK eating spiders in your armoury............i dont want to know really. am hiding already

Hairdresser cars YES. AMG's.......... Definitely not.

Regards,
John

 

[PJH]

When I was 19 or 20, I once opened the face vent and a wasp flew out..... didn't hit anything apart from the wasp.