Stupid parents and idiot children.

[Deleted member 37751]

I think you might be.
Several times at school I was administered the slipper and the cane. At primary school I got the ruler over the palm of the hand and now at my age I certainly don't fit the bill of child abuser. I have never been in front of a judge and I firmly believe that the punishment that I received for my misdemeanours both at school and at home gave me a healthy respect and tolerance of most people, something I might be persuaded not to have for you!

Why do you think society has gone downhill like it has?
Because of all the politically correct tos*ers out there. Rant over. Now debate that!

Yawn............

 

[LTD]

Can you both put down the handbags ?

 

[Deleted member 37751]

Can you both put down the handbags ?

Thanks! It's easy to get carried away at times

Iain, I apologise for my attitude.

 

[Iain]

I'm outta here.

Apparently there are too many people that condone child abuse on this forum.
If we believe everything that we're told

 

[Gollom]

I agree - the issue seems to be is that youths can do what they want with virtually no fear of comeback. Round by me they do pretty much what they want in the open with no attempt to hide. Latest is to slowly stroll across the road when they see a car coming along the ice packed road. The look of defiance on their (hooded) faces tells me what I need to know and I am sure should I fail to stop from my 2-3mph speed that there would be claims flying before you can say ASBO!

Is violence the answer? Most definately not. IMHO the root lies at home, compounded by society's apparant need to mollycoddle.

Again IMHO any transgressions should be punished by the need to do some form of community service. And the political party brave enough to do that would be......?

 

[LTD]

Iain

Don't go.

There is a vast difference between acceptable parental discipline and child abuse and I doubt anyone here would ever condone abusing a child.

 

[Iain]

Iain

Don't go.

There is a vast difference between acceptable parental discipline and child abuse and I doubt anyone here would ever condone abusing a child.

I only meant from this thread!

 

[trapperjohn]

Phew.

Glad you are sticking around.

 

[Iain]

I agree - the issue seems to be is that youths can do what they want with virtually no fear of comeback. Round by me they do pretty much what they want in the open with no attempt to hide. Latest is to slowly stroll across the road when they see a car coming along the ice packed road. The look of defiance on their (hooded) faces tells me what I need to know and I am sure should I fail to stop from my 2-3mph speed that there would be claims flying before you can say ASBO!

Is violence the answer? Most definately not. IMHO the root lies at home, compounded by society's apparant need to mollycoddle.

Again IMHO any transgressions should be punished by the need to do some form of community service. And the political party brave enough to do that would be......?

Steve.
My point was that punishment such as the cane, slipper et all is in no way shape or form child abuse.

Deffo out of here now!

 

[Noodle-Pulp]

Methinks this thread has gone off at a perpendicular tangent.

 

[camerafodder]

"the person you need is Nanny McPhee!"

 

[lancebond]

I had the s**t beaten out of me when I was younger, if I stepped out of line I was brought back into line with a slap, abusive behaviour by today's standards and on it's own it was back then i guess, but my father was a strict naval officer.. so when he came home i lived like i was in boot camp!

I was also taught respect and to listen.

Sadly people today forget that last bit, but opt for the slap (normally they look like they belong on Jeremy Kyle)

Sadly the threat of some stranger clipping you round the lugs is no longer there, kids know what rights they have... No fear of reprisal leads to no order.

Personally I think a stint of national service would work, and before you all harp on I'm 29, served for nearly 8 years and it made me into a well rounded individual, my idea for it was simple. if the tuition fees are raised then why not offer to pay them for the student providing that they first complete two years NS. i'm not saying they need to go to war.. but they can guard bases all over the country, they can get an education that is unlike any other, they can get some self respect, learn what teamwork is really about and make a nice wage at the same time.


A lad from 10 doors up from me who I spent my whole childhood with,Karl ness had no parental contact cause they couldn't be ****d... And ran loose all his life. He's notorious now as the man who gave raoul moat the shotgun... And faces a murder charge on 10th jan. and while i believe some people are just "wrong uns" his brother is currently serving at her majestys pleasure as well..

out of the whole estate we've got one professional footballer, teachers, solicitors, tradesmen, me and then finally we've got two convicts.. both from the family that let them do what they wanted, whenever they wanted, would a slap every so often helped them... it would have at least shown that someone cared what they did.

 

[timskemp]

I think the concept of using physical means to cause instant cessation of behaviour is getting confused here with the concept of using physical violence as punishment for non-immediate behaviour.

If your child goes to run across a road, or to grab a hot pan off the cooker, or goes to strike a match or grabs a lighter, then there is nothing inappropriate or abusive to gaining the child's attention and focussing it on your important advice to stop that behaviour. A slap, with a hand, on a body part such as an arm or a leg along with a firm shout of NO will perform this task, and after a few times the NO will suffice. In fact if this sense of awareness of danger is instilled early enough, and the association of a slap and a NO with parental care and concern is made, then the child is unlikely to do such thing in future.

I would draw the line at any kind of physical chastisement if there is no physical danger to the child and also as any form of retrospective punishment. Swearing, stealing etc can be dealt with by other means.

My youngest when she does something wrong still says "don't smack me" but neither me or her can remember when she last received or deserved a smack.

There is a fine line between "reasonable physical chastisement" and "abuse" - unfortunately the lefty prius driving CO2 driven target centric liberal loonies (small L) have pushed to make any form of physical intervention unacceptable, regardless of the circumstances.

 

[neilrr]

Children are born as untamed animals. If you don't train them in civilised human ways & rules in the first few years then you probably cannot ever train them.

An attention focusing, educational slap when they are young may save them (& you) a lifetime of misery & trouble further down the road.

 

[snoop51]

I wondered when this would turn into another 'Daily Mail' thread....^^
Do you think children should be seen and not heard, aswell? Just give them a good crack when they step out of line, eh? Then wonder why, when they grow up, they equate discipline with violence

Sweetpea I didn't say batter them to a pulp I said a sharp crack as in one. I also didn't say it was the only weapon in my armoury and feel offended that you seem to think I did! I have two older teenagers of my own both are quite level headed and I haven't beaten either of them. They have not overstepped the mark, all I was insinuating is the "poor little dears that cross the road looking directly at you in your car daring you the driver to hit" them may have benefited from a little more discipline in their formative years, other than "now little Johnny please don't do that, angel" type mentality.
As for your insinuation that I am a Daily Mail reader sorry to disappoint but I don't read any newspapers on a regular basis. Nor do I lean one way or the other in a political sense. I say and vote on the things which I see as being pertinent to me and mine at the time..
I'm sorry if I offended your liberal viewpoint as I said it was bound to upset some. I do know one thing though there are a lot more children who are violent, foul-mouthed, spitting in the street little thugs than there used to be. I respected my parents which is a lot more than can be said when walking around with your eyes open in today's society.
Perhaps you don't agree with my viewpoint but don't turn it into a personal attack. A mother lion does not abuse her cubs she just puts them in their place nothing more nothing less.

 

[Deleted member 37751]

Sweetpea I didn't say batter them to a pulp I said a sharp crack as in one. I also didn't say it was the only weapon in my armoury and feel offended that you seem to think I did! I have two older teenagers of my own both are quite level headed and I haven't beaten either of them. They have not overstepped the mark, all I was insinuating is the "poor little dears that cross the road looking directly at you in your car daring you the driver to hit" them may have benefited from a little more discipline in their formative years, other than "now little Johnny please don't do that, angel" type mentality.
As for your insinuation that I am a Daily Mail reader sorry to disappoint but I don't read any newspapers on a regular basis. Nor do I lean one way or the other in a political sense. I say and vote on the things which I see as being pertinent to me and mine at the time..
I'm sorry if I offended your liberal viewpoint as I said it was bound to upset some. I do know one thing though there are a lot more children who are violent, foul-mouthed, spitting in the street little thugs than there used to be. I respected my parents which is a lot more than can be said when walking around with your eyes open in today's society.
Perhaps you don't agree with my viewpoint but don't turn it into a personal attack. A mother lion does not abuse her cubs she just puts them in their place nothing more nothing less.

To be honest, I took the whole argument out of context and I apologise if it came across as a personal attack.
The funny thing is, I'm not normally liberal and I don't know what came over me

 

[Noodle-Pulp]

I don't know what came over me

LOL probably a bit of festive spirit Sweetpea

 

[Nasco12]

I am lucky/unlucky enough not to have any children of my own but I do have two nephews (6 and 8). If they start being rude (as they are wont to do) I tell them to do a forfeit: press-ups, star-jumps, something like that. If they refuse I stop playing with them.

This usually works. Oddly enough before the forfeit they seem to be angling for it but after it's been applied they're as good as gold.

I think violence (towards anyone) is appalling and should only be used in an emergency situation.

 

[Gucci]

I'm a great believer of 'you are a product of your environment'. Whilst some may deviate from this, I've seen plenty of examples. There was a little 4 year old girl following her Dad around the supermarket. She was ecstatic that she managed to carry the 4pt plastic bottle of milk "yay, i gotta mook I gotta mook" with a big smile on her face. Dad's reply (in neanderthal english)... "yeahh alrigh' alrigh, I ge it dunn I , shut it will ya, ya doin me edd in".

Charming. What chance does she have?

But also, an interesting observation. I was in a relationship with a girl who's family were very loving, caring and well educated. They also adopted a lad when he was tiny. All brought up together in exactly the same way, no favouritism. The lad wasn't aware he was adopted until much later. BUT, he was the complete opposite to the family. Unruly, in trouble with the police later on and intimidating in nature.

The nature v nurture debate.

 

[MOCAŠ]

But also, an interesting observation. I was in a relationship with a girl who's family were very loving, caring and well educated. They also adopted a lad when he was tiny. All brought up together in exactly the same way, no favouritism. The lad wasn't aware he was adopted until much later. BUT, he was the complete opposite to the family. Unruly, in trouble with the police later on and intimidating in nature.

The nature v nurture debate.

Or the girl v boy debate, perhaps...

It's not unusual to hear of children rebelling against an idyllic upbringing; it also has a lot to do with the company they keep in their teenage years.