Even more new jokes... (No UK Politics or Football please)

[DSM10000]

 

[ringway]

 

[KillerHERTZ]

Just a reminder to all, please keep Politics/Political jokes to the Political thread and not on here.

As stated on the 1st post of the Politics thread:

Welcome to the mbclub.co.uk UK Politics thread, please use this thread as the only place on the forum we permit Political/Politics/Brexit discussions

Thanks

 

[ss201]

Not a joke per se, but it's not political in the slightest......

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[DSM10000]

Not a joke per se, but it's not political in the slightest......

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No doubt someone will find something to object to in that!

 

[Williamwoo]

No doubt someone will find something to object to in that!

I object to his pullover.

 

[flying haggis]

 

[bob6600]

 

[DSM10000]

 

[DSM10000]

On a bitterly cold winter morning an Irish husband and wife in Dublin were listening to the radio during breakfast.

They heard the announcer say, "We are going to have 8 to 10 inches of snow today.

You must park your car on the even-numbered side of the street, so the snow ploughs can get through"

So the good wife went out and moved her car.

A week later while they are eating breakfast again, the radio announcer said, "We are expecting 10 to 12 inches of snow today.

You must park your car on the odd-numbered side of the street, so the snow ploughs can get through."

The good wife went out and moved her car again.

The next week they are again having breakfast, when the radio announcer says, "We are expecting 12 to 14 inches of snow today. You must park...." Then the electric power went out.

The good wife was very upset, and with a worried look on her face she said, "I don't know what to do. Which side of the street do I need to park on so the snow ploughs can get through?"

Then with the love and understanding in his voice that all men who are married exhibit, the husband replied, "Why don't you just leave the bloody car in the garage this time."

 

[Meldrew2]

I was in our local supermarket earlier. I asked the checkout operator for a discount. She said no. I pointed out that it had todays date on it. She still refused. In the end, I didn't buy the newspaper...

 

[DSM10000]

 

[DSM10000]

 

[DSM10000]

 

[DSM10000]

 

[DSM10000]

 

[bob6600]

 

[NJSS]

 

[DSM10000]

 

[DSM10000]